Handling Insults: With some of your own

28 05 2008

Throughout my good life, I have both received and dealt my good share of insults. Many times, this has been an amusing interaction between my friends and I. However, sharing of insults has not been limited to friends.

In my professional life, I have received plenty of personal insults, often times in front of other employees. Turning the table on these people resulted in some of the most memorable moments in my life as a business person.

This article will be light hearted, but it will give me a chance to share my thoughts on how to receive insults, and how to deal them out. There is some strong language in this article, and I recommend that parents first review it before passing it onto their kids.

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Self Help: The Elusive Pursuit of Perfection

12 05 2008

I am not a fan of self-help. This must sound strange coming from a person who writes articles pertaining to issues of self. Though I intend for the site to be a dialogue of advice rather than a source for unnecessary personal development. This site is like the friend you hang out with at the bar after 2 am, not a self-help guru at a seminar.

I will never “change your life in 4 easy steps”, nor will you “become a better person” just by reading my articles. I believe life is more complicated than that. “4 easy steps” is great for cooking a recipe, but falls short in analysing the complexity of our life.

That said, I have read many books that have made a lasting impact on my life. With these words, I do not wish to discount the power of good advice. I simply want to make the point that the lessons you learn in life will always trump those you read in a book.

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Corporate Jargon: Please. Can you speak like a human being?

2 05 2008

For many years, I have worked in large organisations. I believe I could easily write a list of corporate “mumbo jumbo” to fill several pages of a book. Why people feel the need to use “big meaningless words”, I will never understand.

Some years ago, I was involved in a small client meeting. My job was to gather the requirements of a project so that I can pass it onto our development team. Two very sharply dressed gentlemen entered the meeting room. I was told by a senior manager that they can be a little intimidating.

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Respect: Is Kindness Your Weakness?

9 03 2008

Growing up, I was very lucky to have such selfless parents. Their kindness extended beyond family, to friends, neighbours and work colleagues. My brother and I were taught to treat everybody with respect, kindness and with a nature of giving.

With a heart of gold, I approached my schooling age - an environment that would attempt to abuse, use and crush “kindness” to a pulp. Unfortunately, this is not isolated to young school kids. I found that through all of my years, phases, stages and careers - there were a seemingly endless supply of individuals who would prey on kindness, or act with disrespect simply because they think you are “too nice.”

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You believe WHAT?

13 02 2008

Beliefs. They’re only valid when they belong to us. If only. Beliefs can be positive or self limiting, and even dangerous at times. Our environment, schooling, friends and experiences shape our belief systems. As these factors are unique, no two people on our planet share identical beliefs.

For this reason, it is important to learn to communicate effectively with those who hold a different perspective to our own. In fact, an important lesson is to prioritise human respect ahead of challenging another person’s belief.

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Is it wrong to be single?

6 02 2008

Love is a wonderful thing. Without downplaying the importance of love and relationships, I do want to point out that “single” people among us are often discriminated.

Of course, the severity of this discrimination is minute compared to that of race, gender and sexuality. However, single people are made to (and often make themselves) feel like something is missing. There isn’t.

As “dating” and “getting married” are such common goals in our society, I wanted to address those who have decided not to adhere to these goals. You may be single, but you’re not alone.

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Discussing Money at Work - Part 3: Payment for overtime

1 02 2008

If you do not ask to be paid for additional hours requested by your employer, they will not pay you. For a relatively significant part of my professional life, I worked an inordinate number of unpaid hours beyond the usual 9 to 5.

In fact, my average work week was between 70 to 80 hours. Consultancy roles often called upon working weekends, lunchtimes, late nights, and even public holidays.

Our employment contracts stipulated that we are not to discuss salary or benefits with other employees. One late evening, this rule was broken. A distinguished colleague of ours revealed that he was indeed paid overtime. Between the seven of us, he was the only one who was able to negotiate this benefit.

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Discussing Money at Work - Part 2: Negotiating a Pay Raise

30 01 2008

I used to tip-toe around the subject of money with my managers, so as not to discolour the dedication to my work. I soon found that employers pay you only what they need to.

If you cannot discuss money confidently with employers, your good intentions can soon be turned against you when you are overlooked for a pay increase. Unfortunately, I learned this the hard way. I was a top performer but was seldom compensated because management knew I wouldn’t ask for more.

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Discussing Money at Work - Part 1: Salary negotiation in a job interview

29 01 2008

Your expectation of salary needs to be discussed in a job interview, that is a given. When possible, you should not bring up the rate of pay and leave this for the interviewer.

I have been on both sides of this fence many times, I have played the role of an interviewer and an interviewee throughout my professional career. The single biggest mistake I have witnessed in a job interview is when an interviewee said “Before we bother starting this interview, how much does this job pay.” Yikes!

Career aspirations, wanting to gain experience, or working for our dream company are important factors in our happiness at work. Though we must not discount the importance of pay, as ultimately we are trading our valuable time for money. In a job interview, the interviewer will likely ask you, “What is your expectation of salary?” and “Are you flexible with your expectation?”.

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Discussing Money at Work: An Introduction

29 01 2008

For some, the topic of money is just like any other. For others, the discussion of money can become uncomfortable, especially if it can make us appear greedy.

The discomfort we feel when discussing money with employers is perfectly natural, yet we should endeavour to develop the tactics and confidence to approach conversations that revolve around money. After all, the most important role of a career is to trade our time for money.

We want to be appreciated for our work, and do not want to appear “greedy” in the process. This is a topic that I relate close to. In my early years as an office worker, in an effort to be “polite” I avoided the discussion of money with my employers. As a result, I became severely underpaid compared to colleagues who had the confidence to discuss money with upper management.

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