Jay Morrissey

We are often put in a situation where we need to negotiate with, or confront somebody in authority. For most of us, this is our employer, our direct manager, or even a CEO. Confrontation is already an unpleasant situation, and it is often made worse when the other person is in a position of authority over us.

In my time, I have had the opportunity to work with some amazing managers, and others for whom the term “manager” was simply a title for ego. The latter could certainly learn from the first. Unfortunately, we cannot change people very easily. We can only control what we know and equip ourselves with the confidence necessary to negotiate with and confront authority, whether the individual in question is good-natured, or an extravagant egotist.

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Imagine you woke up this morning and had no expectations of yourself. No standard you had to live up to. How would that feel? In my humble opinion, people demand so much of themselves that their confidence suffers. In a given day, we demand ourselves to look prettier, feel fitter, walk taller, talk with more charisma, work more productively, and even be funnier. Is it any wonder we doubt ourselves?

I have read many pieces of work in the past that focus on visualising, practising, self-hypnosis and many other techniques for dealing with confidence. I think these methods complicate what is really a societal issue: we can’t live up to our own expectations.

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The power to communicate within the human species is our single most precious gift. Still, we have only scratched the surface with our ability to connect with each other. We are taught from a young age: don’t talk to strangers.

This is sound advice when you are seven years old. Though as an adult, this attitude can massively affect your enjoyment of life. We can all agree that the people we know now shape our lives. Yet, we are often shy, scared and even lazy when it comes to meeting new people. I have split this article into five sections, to demonstrate why you need to kick the “shy” habit and come out of your shell.

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Disagreements are a fact of life. They are a necessity for understanding each other, for growth and sometimes as a means of discipline. That said, arguments can get out of control very quickly.

When this happens, both parties of the argument can (and often do) say things that they do not mean. As emotions pour like a fountain, a simple disagreement can turn into a series of personal attacks.

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An eye for an eye makes the whole world blind, but I’d rather be blind than see a coward in the mirror. In our evolutionary history, intimidation was a direct result of physical size. One human being would be intimidated by a larger creature, and even a larger human being. This formula is still in play, you need look only to night-club bouncers, celebrity security guards and biker gangs. As the tolerance for physical violence in our community diminishes, verbal intimidation has found itself a new home in our lives.

Often, the blows from a verbal intimidator can be just as punishing as those from a fist fight. With all matters of survival, if you don’t learn to fight, you will lose. Never instigate intimidation, but learn to fight back when somebody tries to intimidate you.

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In my previous articles, I have often asked what makes a “profession” or “occupation” perceived as superior or inferior to another. The awareness of such an issue is important in determining whether or not our actions are congruent with who we want to be.

In our society, work has taken on a much more significant role than it was initially intended. Rather than simply working for money, we have begun to identify with our job. We take personal satisfaction in holding particular occupations, and at times feel superior to others who are in occupations that are regarded as non-skilled or blue collar.

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The purpose of this article is to motivate those who are currently thinking about leaving their desk jobs for something else, but are clinging to one or more reasons why they should stay.

There are many perks to working in an office. You’re comfortable, there’s no need for labor intensive work and you have access to a kitchen. Perhaps you should consider all of the things you’ve given up for that comfy office job. This is a broad topic however, so this article will focus on the kind of feedback I have received from others when bringing up the subject of “why don’t you give up your office job, and do something else”.

Here are a few common responses I have encountered:

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The western world has been hit with a recent burst of fitness frenzy. Gymnasiums are now more profitable than ever, with people lining up to use treadmills and resistance equipment. Personally, I used to train for 45 minutes a day at the gym every other day. I have since moved my training outdoors and have not looked back. However, how much time should we be spending at the gym?

I believe exercise is like anything else, and requires both efficiency and moderation. If you are spending hours on exercise every day, then you need to ask yourself: “why?”. The purpose of exercise is to make you feel healthy, to have more energy and to look better. Unless you are training for a movie role, or need to lose weight quickly due to blood pressure, you may well be wasting a large portion of your day at the gym. Please don’t misunderstand me, I think going to the gym for 2 hours is better than not going at all, but if your workouts are taking longer than an hour, perhaps you are not using that time efficiently.

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I am a big kid. I enjoy playing practical jokes (both administering and receiving), the occasional prank phone call to a fellow employee, and I make a conscious decision everyday to do something I enjoy. I have decided to give up my office job, and this has been one of the best decisions I have made. Business environments are such that the personality of employees are being suppressed constantly until they are mere drones. I have seen this happen to friends, who now resort only to “corporate speak” even in social environments. People are taking themselves much too seriously.

When we were kids, we liked to create, take risks, spend time with friends and enjoy life. As adults, we make an effort to look young but never to act young. In fact, having fun is often looked down upon by “serious” types. Having fun is seen as a “waste of time”. All of the things we used to do as kids to have fun are now regarded as wasteful. Yet acceptable means of fun have somehow transformed into drinking, cigar smoking and the occasional sporting event.

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Growing up in Western culture, I will be the first to admit that the act of purchasing something new is exciting. From the moment a human being decides they need something, the level of excitement builds until the purchase. After the purchase, the excitement remains for a day or two, then the item simply becomes as unexciting as every other object cluttering our home. Although this may appear to be a trivial affair, it has a devastating effect on our lives, relationships and our environment.

Why do we buy what we don’t need?

As a species we are very intelligent creatures. We learn from our experiences. If something hurts, or does not yield the desired outcome, we learn not to repeat the action again. Why then are we destined to repeat our purchasing behaviour, when we know that the pleasure we derive from it is so limited? I believe this is due to a number reasons:

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